Monday, April 04, 2005

'1600 Pennsylvania Avenue' a mixtape by Chip Kinney

All right!

I’m rested and ready to put down another blog. Last week, I was busier than blind man’s hands on Eliza Dushku ( ). I’m still recovering from the loss of sleep since last Wednesday. This morning, I woke up in the same position that I went to sleep in and my back was screaming loud and clear when I sat up.

Last Friday, I attended the Ashlee Simpson concert at the War Memorial Auditorium here in Greensboro. Say what you will, I don’t care, I am a big fan of cheesy power pop. And, that’s the kind of music Ms. Simpson makes.

A lot of people get wrapped up in the fact that all music has to have lyrical content that makes the song greater than entertainment. Or, that the music has to be the greatest performed by the greatest musicians. This is not true. Do not listen to the stuffy, sexually repressed, and holier-than-thou art-house jerk-off. The only reason Scrooge tells everyone how bad that something is… It’s because he’s not part of the fun.

I didn’t care about Ms. Simpson’s SNL screw-up, I was there to get some cramps from smiling and let go of my problems for a while. I was tired, I could’ve used a shower, and I was dying to get started on the season one DVD of ‘24’ that Netflix had sent me. I was meeting Kim Thore ( ), columnist for ‘Go Triad’ for this event. She had an empty seat next to her that needed to be filled with my beefy buttocks.

Kim was there to write a story about the concert and the atmosphere surrounding it. You can read it in ‘Go Triad’ when it comes out this Thursday. Or, you can visit her website to catch the article.

The Auditorium was wall-to-wall females of all ages. It was amazing! Young girls dressed for exotic dancer auditions as far as your eyes can see. Mothers dressed like casual “madams” walking and standing next to their tarted up daughters. You could have fired up the fumes from cheap, girlie colognes with a single match. Giggles were required along with a ticket to this event sponsored by ThermaSilk.

The parental part of me was shaking my head with mild disgust. The dirty old man part of me was mentally checking I.D.’s for proper leering.

I met a washed up Greensboro rock-n-roller at the show. He was getting a hot dog. I was a little surprised to find him in the mix and asked him why he was there. He said, “Dude, I’m picking up chicks.”

“Don’t you mean soccer moms?” I asked.

No joke. He said, “Either. Or.”

I then experienced a brief, all over body shiver. I knew that he was serious.

As far as my concert experienced eyes and ears could tell, Ms. Simpson was in fact singing live. Her voice was buried deep in the mix and I could detect a little bit of effects to fatten up her singing. But, I didn’t care. I was having a good time just like all the ladies in the house.

At one point, Ashlee was telling the audience how making mistakes are a positive thing in life. That it was okay to make them as long as you got back up and gave it another try. I leaned over to Kim and told her that not only did I sense a new empowerment inside, but I was also getting my period. I couldn’t hear her over the din, but I think she snorted with laughter.

We rounded out the night by heading over to the Blind Tiger ( ) for Cyril Lance ( ). If you’re gonna have some cheese, why not round it out with some great blues and Miller High Life for a buck and a half?

We didn’t stay long. I had been awake since 3:45 am the day before and I was quickly approaching the 24 hour mark with my eyelids open. Kim also needed to split the scene as well. She needed to get up early and prepare her home for a ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ party.

Once I got home, I HAD to put on disc one of season one of ‘24’.

I missed the boat on ‘24’ and I don’t think that it’s easy to get caught up by jumping in the middle and trying to hold on. So, I watched the first episode.

To me, it seemed a little slow. I was told that the show was “non-stop” and I was waiting for it to pick up some steam. I tried to keep in mind that it was the set-up episode to get the characters established and start up with the storyline. I’m sure that business will eventually bust wide open.

But then again, I’m a rather desensitized bastard.

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