Sunday, July 05, 2020

An Appetizer For Thought

In case you weren’t aware of it, I like a good conspiracy theory. Elvis faking his death, the government coverup concerning aliens and Area 51, The Clintons, and et cetera.

I’m hearing a LOT of conspiracy theories about COVID-19. China loosed it to attack America… It’s here to destroy Trump, destroy his chances of re-election… It’s a Democratic ploy to attack the rights of American citizens… The Democrats are using it to destroy Trump and conservatism… It’s here to kill small businesses… They’re padding the numbers and contributing every death to the disease... Blah, blah, blah

Again, I like a good conspiracy theory. The Assassination of JFK is one that I actually believe. But all these COVID-19 conspiracies are ridiculous.

Look, I’m not the smartest guy in the world. But where is the logic in some of these conspiracies?

All right my right-wing friends… Here’s a possible conspiracy theory that I’m seeing that you’re not…

The Democrats who are attacking your rights by mandating masks in public DO NOT WANT YOU TO WEAR A MASK. They want you to catch the COVID-19. They don’t want you to show up on election day. They want you to die. They want you locked away in ICUs, in hospitals, and at home. They don’t want you out voting. They don’t really want you wearing masks. Because if anyone that identifies themselves as a liberal that wants you to wear a mask for the safety of everyone, they’ll be seen as someone that doesn’t have your freedom of choice in mind. They want you to buck the system. They want you to get your conservative friends sick. They want conservative voices quiet when election day comes.

Conservatives have gotten governors to fall to the Re-Open pressures. Non-mask wearing people are crowding everywhere as if there’s no threat except to their God-given rights NOT to wear a mask. They believe all the conservative outlets that masks don’t help.

Perhaps those outlets are feeding you BS to help you right into the hospitals, ICUs, and self-quarantines?

As I see it… If there is a conspiracy, they’re trying to kill off conservatives with the virus. LOTS of conservatives believe that masks don’t help. Everyone wants to get the economy going again, but the liberals realize that conservatives will just carry on as if the virus is merely a bad cold. The conservatives will fall victim to a greater conspiracy that they cannot even see.

Now THAT’S an attack on Trump and conservatives! Say anything and the conservatives will do the opposite. America is so divided that those conservative cronies will fall like dominos. Biden wins! And Joe and Nancy will replace the stars n’ bars with a hammer and sickle!

Look… If I were a Trumplodyte, I’d wear a mask. I’d be washing my hands until I’m through singing the album version of “In-A-Gadda-Di-Vida”. I’d be using hand-sanitizer until I could feel the alcohol in my bloodstream. I’d be social distancing. I’d do anything the CDC suggests in order to stay alive and healthy so that I could vote for my favorite orange moron in November.

And for the record, I’m voting Jo Jorgensen in November. I’ll be at the polls with a mask on because I actually care about my fellow Americans. When this COVID-19 started I began wearing a mask in public. Why?

Because if you haven’t noticed, China seems to get hit with epidemics all they time. And when they get hit, they’re wearing masks to help stop the spread of the latest virus/infection. They are 1.4 billion of them so they must be doing something right.

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