Pretty Things 'Savage Eye'

Have you ever tried experimenting with bringing a style back?

I tried it the other day with very little success. People gave me the kind of looks reserved for men that relieve themselves on cages filled with kittens.

I saw Denis Leary rocking the look on an episode of Rescue Me and wondered to myself… “That’s a style that should come back. It’s totally working for Leary.”

Without planning anything, I slipped a golf shirt over my magnificent body the next day before going to work. And as fate would have it, the collar was standing upright. Children of the 80’s refer it as the “popped” collar.

During the 1980’s, the popped collar was everywhere. It was like skin at a nudist camp. And odd as it may seem, I never wore the popped collar back then.

So anyways, I left my collar popped that day and decided to follow the path that Mr. Leary was blazing.

As I waited at the stoplight at Horse Pen Creek Road and New Garden to get onto Bryan Boulevard, I noticed a woman smiling at me as she drove across my path through the intersection. Her eyes followed me until she passed by me. So I thought to myself… “She must be digging the popped collar.”

After all, it looked good on Leary and I was sure it looked good on me.

I got to work and no one paid any attention to my popped collar. So I decided to strut around the office like I just got off the set of Miami Vice to show off my daredevil style sensibilities.

No one wanted to take the bait, so I asked the ladies what they thought about my popped collar. And I’ll give you the abridged version… They didn’t care about my popped collar and they were happy that the style had died like Dustin Diamond’s career.

Will “Sports Boy” Tate (WLXN) walked into the office with his golf shirt and I said, “Hey man, pop that collar!”

“I will not,” Will replied.

“Come on, man,” I pleaded. “Don’t you want to bring back the popped collar?”

Will looked at me with his steely eyes and said, “I think not.”

As I understand things… Kids these days are all about vampires. They love that Twilight crap. So why aren’t they popping those collars?

Hell. If a popped collar was good enough for Dracula, the ultimate vampire, then it should be good for all those emo kids who love melodramatic bloodsuckers.

I know a high school kid that’s trying to bring back suspenders. Why?

I’m not sure.

He’s been wearing those goofy little hats, skinny jeans, and now he’s going all “Mork from Ork”.

So I just left a message on his mother’s answering machine trying to appeal to his trailblazing style resuscitation. Because I’m sure that if a high school kid gets it going, it will take off like a fire in Athens.

And this Wednesday, August 26th lets all rock the popped collar. Take a picture and post it on your Facebook or MySpace.

Lets rock it, beeotches!