Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Bus Stop 'A Little Faster'

I plan on doing something soon, but I’m afraid that many will think that I’m going through some sort of midlife crisis. And that’s simply not the case… I’m planning on getting Motorcycle certified.

I’ve haven’t piloted a motorized 2-wheeler since I was a kid… And I wouldn’t dare categorize that Briggs & Stratton powered tubular frame with 2 wheels as a motorcycle. At best, you could call it a mini-bike. Perhaps even a mini-mini-bike. I was about 10 years old when I rode that thing and it went much like the historic flight of the Wright Brothers. There was a few feet of freedom and then I came crashing down to Earth.

I never told my mother, but after I wiped out… I could hear her voice repeatedly shouting in my head about how deadly motorcycles were. And she would have thrown in her fears about KISS to boot! They were both considered “rebellious” during that time in my life so why not hit me with both barrels when she had the chance. So I stayed away from the motorcycles because I could hide the KISS LP’s, but I couldn’t hide the missing skin.

Seriously… I want to get motorcycle certified.

1. No one on the Rock 92 air staff is able to pilot a motorcycle. And who knows? We may have a reason one day to take one to different station remotes and events… Much like the Nissan and Mini Cooper in years past.

2. I’m thinking about getting a scooter.

Gasoline is getting so expensive that it’s affecting the way I drink and how I spend my once disposable income. I don’t even want to drive Roxy to the local store for something that I really need because of rising gas prices.

I nearly broke out in hives the other day when I had to fill my gas tank and noticed that fuel was $3.49 a gallon. And from what I hear coming out of the mouths of the hand-wringers around me… Gasoline may be over $5 a gallon before the end of the year!

I’ve gotten to where I only take Roxy (Ford Ranger with aV-6 Power Plant) out when I absolutely have to.

So I got to thinking about getting a scooter because those crazy things get about 70 to 75 miles to the gallon. The more I thought about it… I started a list of comparisons on a pad of paper. The savings in fuel costs would break even with the payments. It would be the perfect vehicle to ride around town and drive to work. If there was the threat of rain… I’d take Roxy out instead.

Every math equation that I could think of… It was a check in the purchasing a scooter column. The only setbacks would be purchasing a helmet and paying for a course to get motorcycle certified. And the savings still outweighed the costs.

I’ll have to get skull and flame decals for it. I also have to get little silhouette stickers of dogs and cats to represent the “kills”. You know… The way WWII pilots marked their kills on the fuselage of their fighter planes…

I have to toughen up the scooter somehow… I think it’ll have to take more than just a leather jacket or a denim vest proclaiming that I’m a member of the “Hell’s Cherubs” scooter gang to do just that.


  1. Anonymous9:21 AM

    nice choice in music today.

    i just joined a carpool of all things- how rock is that.

    have a good one

  2. Anonymous10:25 AM

    No need to toughen it up..... just get a tag that says 75MPG-U?

  3. Clay,

    You've expenses like strings, cords, and guitars. In my eyes, it's very rock!

  4. Anonymous2:21 PM

    You mark the scooter with dog and cat kills... I will mark my car with innocent children kills... J-hot

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