Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Hank Williams, Jr.’s ‘Greatest Hits’

Over the weekend, I watched Brokeback Mountain on DVD from Netflix.

My mother was in a slight state of disbelief when I told her what movie I had. She asked, “Why would you want to see that?”

“I like good love stories,” I said. “I don’t care if it’s two women, two men, or a combination of the sexes. If it’s a good film, I don’t care.”

Of course I neglected to tell her that I really prefer a love story with two women that concentrates more on the sex and less on the love… Again… Baby steps are the way to go. I can’t just unload everything on her at once, her left arm will go numb and I’d have to take her to the Emergency Room.

“How can you watch something like that?” she asked. “I thought I brought you up better than that.”

“You did,” I replied. “You brought me up to be open minded.”

BURN!

She didn’t say a word after that.

So later, I threw that rump-ranging flick into my DVD player and settled in for some manly, Levi Garrett soaked kissing.

Now, I must admit that I felt a little uneasy when they first discovered that they both wanted to have sex. Ledger quickly got into place and pushed his camel through the needle’s eye and I winced with a little discomfort. To put my reaction into perspective… Have you ever seen guys react to shots or kicks in the jewels?

That was pretty much my reaction.

Their kissing didn’t bother me, just the implied anal sex did.

I found the movie to be worthy of 4 out of 5 stars on the Netflix scale.

Last night, I asked my sister Tina and her boyfriend Richard if they had seen it. They both said no.

Tina can’t see it because she just can’t witness Ledger lying down with another man. Richard can’t watch it because it would shatter his belief in the cowboy lifestyle.

The one thing that I learned from that film… Sheep are very dumb animals.

I’ve been around them in West Virginia because lots of folks up there raise them. But, I’ve never hung out with them. You see them in the fields and you don’t give them much thought. They are merely scenery.

Within a few minutes of screen time, I learned that sheep are terribly dumb. And they have to be looked after on the open range all the damn time. Sheep =’s Dumb.

For some wild reason, I’ve been receiving more and more of the New Releases from Netflix. Even though they have been on short wait and long wait, they’ve been sending them instead of season 6 of Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

Normally, I wouldn’t mind. But when Buffy and Spike are getting involved with each other, I wanted more. I had to KNOW what was going to happen next. It was killing me.

So I did something that I should have done a long time ago… I made a separate queue for my television shows on DVD.

That should never be a problem again. I don’t mind waiting, but I’ll gladly take instant gratification when I can get it.

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